Match Report
Sunday 12 May –v- Maidstone Etceteras at The Mote
The wedding in Manchester of the "Interfered With", deprived us of the skip and also "The Interferer" himself, who was presumably in search of a northern equivalent of "The Harold Gibbons Room" in which to continue his reputation of wedding day molestation. Mr Lewis was another notable absentee, presumably giving due consideration to the recent Press Complaints Recommendation. He was allegedly sighted in Harley Street, outside the office of a world renowned cosmetic surgeon.
Stepping into the breach came Lofty, Silver Fox and Sumo Morrison, back from injury. To make up our eleven(in the absence of an Indian taxi-driver) Jim managed to drag in another colleague from AEI Cables in the shape of Kim Terrill. Understandably in the absence of the skip, there were no problems with the projected meet time and we made good time, despite some reckless use of the outside lane from Gordon. Now he’s got a Citroen he seems to think he is some sort of a lad. Perhaps now Neil is back he will calm down a bit!!
After a quick pint of Strongs Country and a sneak view of events on the main pitch, we discovered that Nob Clark had again called with accuracy and elected to bat on the nearest we will come to a belter. The Revenue Boys did the honours, with JB doing his best to maintain the blistering first over assault that seems to be the hallmark of Crusader innings this year. Gordon obviously had not calmed down from his rally drive to the ground and took that cavalier approach to the wicket with him. For the first time this year we found ourselves staring down the barrel(and it wasn’t beer),with Gord being followed back to the pavilion in quick succession, by Makker, despite a studious look at things and John, who obviously thought he was Steve L for the day. The rescue package came through two partnerships, the first between Timmo and Nob, which carried the score towards respectability and the second involving Spud with the free scoring Timms. Limp had inspected the pitch for a long time hoping for signs of uneven bounce, but finally had to accept the track was tailor-made for his ‘fanny-might-get-hurt’ temperament. A splendidly controlled knock, in the face of a worthy leg-spinner, contained eleven fours and a six and only became shabby in the last ten minutes when jug evasion was at a premium. After GT’s demise for 91, AEI proved to anyone who didn’t already know that communication is vital in business, with Jim and Kim almost telepathically gliding between the wickets. Special mention to the hoick of the day, which collected Kim six runs to the longest boundary on the ground. Neil was last out, looking like he had hardly been away, allowing Tubby to declare five minutes early on 180-8 from a meagre 37.1 overs. Tea was a proper sit down affair, though for £28 I was wondering where the topless serving wenches were. The Maidstone openers proved more than a match to our equivalents with the ball and it soon became apparent that unless a breakthrough was forced, our target would prove insufficient. Tubby turned to his prolific left arm duo, to break the deadlock and despite taking some early tap, Chris produced the required wicket, with one that apparently did all sorts. Removing the opener did not open the hoped for floodgate and still staring defeat in the face we were forced onto the defensive. Silver Fox returned for a second stint that was far more accurate backed with the luxury of ring field protecting any poor deliveries. His persistent line and length was rewarded with two victims in as many overs, removing both Maidstone’s prime players. This exposed a tail that Crusaders of old, would have been hard pressed to surpass and pushed the onus firmly towards a surprise victory. If only Spud had been thrown the ball earlier than the token last over gesture he was offered the final result could have been so different.
